Driving home one day and I saw a yard sign that said, “Always choose kind!” I sighed in my heart because I knew what it was referring to and I don’t agree.
“永远选择恩慈” 这句话出自韦恩•戴尔，美国畅销励志书籍作者，一个教导新纪元信仰的老师。他信仰每个人的身体里有一种能量，这种能量让人变成神。他的原话是：“当只能选择正确和恩慈时，选择恩慈。” 戴尔已经去世，但他这句话在社交平台的传播下，已成为名句。就连好莱坞也用这句话来作为电影的点睛之笔。
The yard sign was quoting Wayne Dyer, a New Age teacher who believed everyone has a “source” in their body that can make them a god. He said, “when given the choice between being right and being kind—you’ll always choose to be kind.” Dyer has passed away, but social media definitely made his saying popular. Even Hollywood used this line to make their movies sound profound.
The reason people choose kind over right is that they define “being right” as “my personal opinion is right”. They associate being right with being proud and having a big ego. If we are talking about our ego, sure, choose to be kind. If it is just personal opinion or preference, such as if we should put pineapples on pizzas, sure, being kind, and order two pizzas accordingly for both sides.
There’s nothing wrong with choosing kind, but if it compromises truth, then it means to “Choose kind and do wrong”. Dyer believed the “source” that makes you a god is always loving and has no judgment. Based on this no judgment belief system, doing wrong has no bad consequence. So compromising truth becomes reasonable.
When it’s not about human’s ego or personal preference, but the truth, specifically God’s truth and righteousness, I disagree with Dyer, Hollywood, social media… Because I don’t serve a “source” but the God in the Bible who is kind and right at the same time and all the time. The God in the Bible judges. No matter the circumstance, there’s no excuse in God’s eye for doing wrong, or speaking biblically, sin.
Kindness and righteousness both are God’s character. God can not choose one of them. Because when he chooses one, he denies another part of himself. God can not deny himself. His godliness shows that true kindness and true righteousness can’t be separate.
The type of kindness that lies and ignores wrong is not true kindness. It doesn’t improve us morally or intellectually, or speaking biblically, it doesn’t edify. Dyer said that choosing kind by simply saying “You are right about that”. This works when your listener is right, but what if he is wrong? Should we never correct the wrong?
Wanting someone to be right is kind and loving to that person. That’s why parents will teach their children right from wrong, instead of being silent or letting them continue in their wrong behaviors.
“Charity suffereth long, and is kind; …rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth.”–1 Corinthians 13:4-6
The Bible says charity and kindness enjoy truth. Charity, kindness, and truth are bound together. Dyer’s question is a wrong proposition because kindness and righteousness are not against each other. When Christ died on the cross for our sins, it was kind of him to take away our punishment. Meanwhile, it showed God’s justice for sins which is a right thing that sin was not ignored. How kind God was to make things right!
Dear Wayne, when you choose God’s righteousness, you ARE choosing kindness.